Awareness awareness week

It's Islamic Awareness week at university. Not a-bloody-gain. Every time I go into town there's a group of blokes inviting me to discover Islam or increase my awareness of Islam. Just how aware of it can I get? Well, admittedly, in my case, quite a lot more. I know very little about Islam. I'm sure, like all other religions, the spiritual side is a load of non-sensical rubbish, but likewise I guess there're lots of good messages as to how to live in there too.

Anyway, I'm getting off the point. My complaint is about constant awareness drives we're subjected to. Not overly subjected to, mind, as no-one ever seems to be aware of what the current day, week, or month is dedicated to the awareness of. For example, did you know that we are currently in (unless it finished in the last couple of days, see how aware I am) National Bed Month? For crying out loud, I'm aware of my bed!! I make it (half-heartedly) every morning. It calls to me every night. And it compels me to stay when I try I get out of it at 7:45am every day. If anything I'm too aware of the damn thing!

And beds aren't the only thing. Some of the others I can remember from recently are:

• National scissors awareness day.
• National toupee week.
• National scalding hazards awareness day.

I for one am finding it hard to keep up with all these awareness drives. I'm just not aware of them half the time. As such, I propose a National Awareness Awareness week where we all undertake, for one week, to become more aware of awareness drives. By the end of it we'll all be so aware of everything we'll never be in danger of anything ever again. And I'll have a better understanding of Islam, thus saving me from talking to the really bored looking guy in town to find out more.